Sunday, October 02, 2005

About My Little Sweetie

Lemme tell ya about Becky. We're coming to our 5th anniversary, known each other for about 6 years. My Little Sweetie's 5' 10", 284 pounds (yes, I know and watch yer mouth - I'm 6-6 and 340 lb., so she's My Little Sweetie). Her hair is white, turned prematurely gray (through what she's had to put up with over the last 6 years, no doubt). She has twinkly blue eyes, a sweet smile and a gentle disposition. She also drives me crazy.

We have acknowledged that we have little in common - I'm a Gamer, she's a Christian (well, I am too, but as a former Catholic, it has made me quite a cynical Christian). She likes family, I don't mind family, but I'm more inclined to like my friends. She's from here (Oklahoma), I'm from SoCal. She's Conservative, I'm a Former Liberal currently a Moderate (I take what I want and leave the rest - like your salad bar). So, we have problems finding common ground. Fortunately it doesn't get in the way in day-to-day things, but it rears it's ugly head occasionally.

One thing that we're somewhat opposed on is that she's a Practical, Common-Sense Person, I'm a Dreamer and Recovering Stupid Person (I'm not really stupid but I've been doing a real good imitation for so long - for survival/coping reasons - it's a hard road). That gets in the way bigtime occasionally. I also don't always see the use in arguing most of the time. As a result, she gets frustrated with my way of "arguing."

These things are not the reason she drives me crazy.

She drives me crazy because she still loves me and I don't understand why. I know why I love her. Aside from the fact that she helped me when I was at one of the lowest points of my life, always encourages me even though I don't feel worthy of it and, despite the above, joins me on ventures that she obviously is not interested in, I love her touch, her voice, her smile, her caring, the fact that she's a wonderful bedmate and several other things I can't put into words right now.

But the one grievance, the one nitpick, the one thing that drives me crazy about Becky is that, my opinion of myself, my self-esteem and my faults is pretty low but she sees. She sees something deep down inside me that's good and right. Something I'm unable to see. Something I just can't wrap my brain around.

And she loves me for it.

That's what drives me crazy about Rebecca Jane. And I thank God for it.


Mitch said...

Hey SJ-

Followed your link from the Verdict.
All I gotta say is: BEST...BLOG...TITLE...EVER!

Steve O said...

Nice man! Great to see more of the regularos into this blog sheezy. To use net "lingo" that i hear is "all the rage".

Since i know you're down i thought i'd spill: Our Eberron campaign fell apart after only three sessions - but i've got a great tight group of guys and we've just finished night #2 of Shadowrun - and we're having a blast! It's gonna take a lot to kill this mutha! :) I am geek!

Anonymous said...

"She sees something deep down inside me that's good and right. Something I'm unable to see. Something I just can't wrap my brain around."

I love you for same reason. Even though I consider you a dork, there is something genuine about you that makes me consider you one of the coolest Nothinglanders.